Deap Throat

So far, things have gone bad, I have no real energy to write, but am going to give it a shot as if I don't I will remember this as a bit of a down period, which it very defiantly is not. It is a period of total discomfort, utter morale destitution with all layers of self stripped away.

But it is not without amusing anecdotes. The second day I was doing some extra curricular walking activity. Actually, just trying to stand up on my own. I achieved it and was feeling proud but I suddenly needed a pee. Ah nothing to pee with, my willy (sp) was occupied with the catheter collecting wee. Nothing for it, let the the catheter do it job. Except it did not and I had just pissed all over myself. Call the nurse and look a bit sheepish. The second time they caught me standing they simply removed the catheter.

It  should be nice having a girl hold onto your penis, but I can assure you there is 100% no sexual enjoyment when she is pulling out a length of 10cm pipe (Kept in place with an inflatable ball, ouch if deflation of that is forgotten)

Of all the post surgery procedures, having them insert a tube through the nose down to the stomach has got to be the worst possible thing. I mean, this pipe is tiny in diameter (maybe half a centimeter) but I was retching, vomiting all the way down. Then they need to adjust it for length.  I have now had this thing in for a day and have another night of it at least.

Today I got caught short and needed a poo. I am immobilized to my bet while having the stomach collection tube. But I had seen how the nurses had decoupled the pump. So I did that to make sure I got on the pot before shitting the bed. I had was having my poo when the I suddenly wanted to vomit. I did vomit all over the bath room. The vomit had gone passed the pipe and into my mouth. 100% bile. Anther round of apologies. It was nasty.

As to running, not done much this week! But want to use all my running training (motivation) to get back into shape just so I can lift the kids (if I ever get out the hospital)

Goals:

• Get pipe taken out
• Get poo working properly
• get home
• walk 5 minutes
• take it from there.

Triple Bummer

In an attemt at forcing myself to do something, will write briefly about todays developments:

a) No sleep
b) Pain
c) Unfomfortable
d) Feeling sick

Then I was sick and to make a short story sorter, I now am draining my stomach through my nose.

Am in a state of panic right now.... HELP.... but who am I asking?

Double Bummer

(Thanks for the title Karl) In a few hours here I am on my way to the first surgery I have ever had (Not including having my arm reset after dislocating my elbow (14 years old), a little bit of keyhole stuff on my knee and having 4 teeth taken out when I was 10 - to make space)

This week I have taken it easy and trained like I was going in for a big race - i.e. a taper, well, actually no running at all but eating like a taper. A couple of weeks ago before the last abscess growing phase, I managed some pretty respectable times, so I will be able to see just how much fitness I will lose over the coming weeks or months.

The surgeon has suggested a 90% chance of success. This sounds like pretty good odds, but I can't help thinking that this still a 10% chance of failure and those odds I do not like so much. Failure means the Double Bummer.

One good outcome is I am back on the hospital diet from tomorrow (for at least 48 hours) and that is no food or drink. So again I should not only lose some weight due to lost body parts, but also just some general weight loss. - I expect this will be muscle as I will also be flat on my back for a while or at the very least confined to my prison cell.

My last stay in hospital I had to share my cell with another inmate. He was shocked when I described staying in hospital as like being in prison. He was in for some gall stone removal do you get the idea they type of ward I am on?

False Anus

Tomorrow I enter the hospital for a colon resection (laparoscopic). The actual operation is the day after entering hospital. Hopefully they will not need to open me up fully, that takes more time to mend and what I really am scared about is what the French call a False Anus, that is needed when the resection does not join properly and you need to have a colostomy bag for a week or 3, or even a month or more.

I seem to remember John Wayne had a colostomy bag attached to the inside of a long coat for quite some time (before popping his clogs) He was allot older than me at the time of the operation and The Queen Mum had a colostomy for 30+ years before she died. Maybe I should be less worried?

I am at the moment very apprehensive.  It is a 3 hour operation into the gut. If I was feeling in pain I would be much less worried, I would probably welcome the intervention, but right now I am feeling on top form. - Could easily go out and run 20 miles. So why oh why am I having somebody cut me up!

On top of all that, we should be signing for the sale of our house on Friday, obviously I cannot be at the Notary's, so will be waking up after the operation hopefully in good shape and  with a sold house (Cecile will not be coming to the hospital while the sale is being signed of course)

Dieting

I have been in hospital all day, on a supposed emergency and yet it took until 18:00 until I got some drugs. Discounting the very limited high I got from the scanner dye (some kind of iodine that makes your throat get warm and your bum tingle)

Anyway, I have a 3cm abscess (Not as big as last month) and so am not allowed food or water. I am up to about 3 days with very limited food intake now. I am on a diet binge cycle. The hospital diet certainly reduces your weight.

If I am in any form of running shape by the time the MDMB comes along, then maybe I will just pace Norma for the first 10km then drop out. She might be medically fit by then, but probably not ready for the run.

... Must dash Cecile is on her way here, she is bringing a burger for herself to eat while talking to me. Oh God can be cruel!

5 Times

The doc tells me to meet him in the Hospitalization wing of the clinic after a telephone call by the wife. Little did he explain that that actually meant I was being admitted into hospital. Provisionally for 2 days.

So the day started badly, but it was not until the nurse tried putting in the catheter did I realize the extent of my bad luck at the moment... It took 5 attempts to get a vein at much cost in pain. I am a wimp when it come to people sticking things in my body.

Double Merde

Yesterday was Joanne's birthday party. I woke up with what felt like a hangover and later turned out to be fever - 39 degrees (could not have been a hangover as I had had just a small beer the night before). Luckily the party was all girls and we had great weather. I hung around in the background hoping not to be noticed and asked any questions that needed more than a grunt for an answer.


A handful of parents decided to torture me more by staying a couple of hours for an aperitif.

It was also the day that we had 2 visits of the house before 10am (for the sale). That was not so bad, especially as somebody said they would pay us some money for it! ... Will see in the next week or so after the signature if the money is really there.

The double merde was the addition of a pain when weeing. Significant because this is the symptom I have had twice before when having Diverticulitis. Actually caused by the abscess pressing on a nerve. Looks like I will be calling the Doc tomorrow. I am hoping that it is not immediate surgery, I am not in pain from the gut maybe it is just hypochondria.  

600m

I was joking with Norma that after breakfast in Quick (I had been letting visitors look over the house) I would get out and do 600m vertical in preparation for the MDMB. The garmin training center says I got pretty close to that over the 14km I put in. - Unfortunatly, the Training Center stats for elevation differ from the Garmin Connect software, putting it down at a measly 410m

It was about 5km more than I had expected to do, and at the top of the climb, I almost descended to do the backside too, luckily I decided extending too far would be unwise. It was only Sunday  I was struggling to do a short 6km run after a couple of harder runs during the week.

It has been glorious spring days for about a week now, there is no need to coerce myself out the door. Looking back just a couple of weeks, things have really improved. This was taken on a trail in the same area as I ran yesterday. Yuck.